Moving

From the Tao of Healing:

The pendulum swings to and fro...

The sage had found the stillpoint between;

Remaining neutral

She teaches by living a simple, honest life;

She creates by allowing, 

She feeds without forcing,

And gives by receiving.

She heals by perceiving

One's inner wholeness,

Then let's go.

Because she lets go,

She's always in touch.

Moving is hard. Even moving across the neighborhood. I have experience with moving, and probably, as assumed, moving to a new country has been the hardest. Not bad, just difficult. Exciting, new, refreshing, fun; but difficult. 

Moving challenges parts of me that were hiding. It reminds me of the good things that I left. Friends, closeness to family, comfort, convience,my blue hoodie, etc. At the same time, moving can be somewhat easy. We purged our lives of lots of junk (literally) and set off on a family adventure that Josh and I have dreamily spoken about in the years we've been together. Here we have more quiet time, empty drawers and less piles, less laundry, less dishes. More time and space to be and be together.

Moving allows me to feel homesick. Homesick for gone/far-away moments; balmy Florida fall mornings, quiet moments setting up my classroom, building fires at Granny's or in my backyard, eating at Moe's, seeing fall and Halloween decorations literally exploding out of everywhere, making the quick 7 hour drive to my family, driving.

Moving demands for me to acknowledge to anxiety i feel. I'm fairly adventurous - sometimes laid-back and spontaneous, but moving makes everything new. New stores, new systems, new daily tasks, new weather. It can be tiring - which provokes the yearning for something that I already know.

Moving makes me a stronger person, wife, mama, friend, daughter, sister - all of those other things that I am...At the end of the day, I can reflect on the new experiences and then tomorrow, they'll be the things I learned how to do yesterday, and then they will become the things that I know.